Invisibly Magnificent (Flash Back)

I am open.

Vulnerable to this time and space.

Restless nights seem to become more.

I see not until now.

I have done it again.

This cycle is on repeat.

Just Stop!

Just Stop!

Yet I remain the ghost.

Invisibly magnificent.

Intelligent.

Weak.

Those eyes, that smile.

You.

This cycle is on constant repeat.

And Like a thief, you take my breathe.

My beat.

My life.

I do not want this.

I feel helpless.

Hopeless.

Afraid.

Blinded by your energy.

Your glory.

I stand before you……… empty.

Yet full of you.

In my eyes, a ghost.

Again, restlessness pours down.

Confused and ashamed.

I become an infant in your glory.

If I make it thru again,

I will give anything.

Anything not to feel.

Not to breathe.

Not to cry.

Not to have this restlestness.

To be this ghost.

Your rest is endless.

I'm not as lucky.

But I am invisible.

Magnificent.

Confused.

Lost.

A child.

I acknowledge this cycle of repeat.

I press stop.

I want this not.

I can't.

And somehow won't.

You owe me this.

You owe me nothing.

I lay.

Wide awake.

Open.

Vulnerable.

A ghost created by me.

J.Mc